Self Awareness

Customer Disservice

What’s Your Face Saying?

It was a typical Monday morning beehive of activities at the airport. My flight was on time, and because of frequent flier privileges, I was able to board early with an upgrade to the premium cabin. As I boarded, I was expecting the usual smiling and welcoming face of one of the flight attendants at the door. But it was different this time.

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Waiting for me at the door was a tall, stern-looking flight attendant. I’ll call him Joe. At best, his “welcome aboard” was delivered with a frown. In reality, it was scary; delivered with scorn. It was a complete departure from what I was used to. So much so that I had to do a double-take. I quickly walked past him to my seat lest I get a slap just for boarding! Yes, I’m exaggerating a little here. But his expression definitely made me not want to slow down around him as I walked by.

For many people with customer-facing job responsibilities, it could be tough to present and maintain a cheerful attitude at all times. It may even be more difficult for those whose roles demand that they keep a smile on their faces most of the time. But when you’re the customer on the other side of that face, you usually don’t take the time to think of the reasons why the person doesn’t seem to be cheerful. After all, you have a lot on your mind too. Your first thought could be, “what’s wrong with him?” But the reasons for the expression  on his face could be as myriad as the number of seats on a jumbo jetliner.

Joe could be having a bad morning. It could be a carry-over from something that happened to him over the weekend. It could have stemmed from an unpleasant discussion he just had with one of the pilots or another flight attendant. Maybe he’s just worried about how he’s going to pay the huge credit card bill he just received in the mail. Or the IRS is after him for a backlog of unpaid taxes!

On second thought, it could also be that that is what his face normally looks like. That may be his resting face. I’ve heard “resting face” defined as the expression on your face when your thoughts are neutral; when they’re neither sad nor happy.

Now, I’m not one to comment on another person’s resting face. I’ve been told a few times that my resting face is a frowny one. As a result, I’ve tried over the last few years to smile when I’m meeting new people. Yes, sometimes I forget and I get pre-occupied with my own thoughts. But I’m trying to get better at it. The fact remains that a smile usually brightens someone’s outlook and communicates that you’re welcoming and approachable.

As a leader, I know I have to maintain a positive and cheerful attitude for my teams, despite my frowny resting face. Just as Joe’s facial expression made me not want to engage him in any way, no team is motivated or engaged when the leader appears unfriendly, even if he’s bubbling inside. I’m almost certain that what Joe’s face reflected, is probably not what he meant to communicate to me. Or maybe it was! I watched him throughout the hour-long flight, and he had the same stern expression all the time.

So, what’s your resting face like? What does it communicate?

If it’s a frowny one like mine, what will you do about it?

Why Leaders Need Short Memory

When it’s difficult to forget

As a web designer, Matt was passionate about his job. He loved what he did. He’s willing to give his best every time. And he delivered too! He was one of the better performers on the team. If you want top notch work, you need him on your team.

But suddenly, things seemed to have taken a turn for the worse. This once very productive and engaged employee has turned into a shadow of his old self. His morale is shattered. He now dreads getting up to go to work each day. The love for what he does has gone cold. He could no longer give his best. His productivity is suffering.

Hold on a second! How did we get here? To understand this, let’s back up a little.

Although Matt delivered on the job, he also came with some baggage. He was a little rough around the edges. He would do a good job, but the way he did it rubbed many on the teams the wrong way. His approach could be seen as abrasive at times. Matt didn’t see it that way. He thought people should be able to hear the truth told to them even if it hurts. He didn't see eye to eye on this issue with Jenny, his manager.

But that was a long time ago. After years of feedback and coaching, Matt has come around and you can now see definite signs of improvement. He’s not completely there yet, but you could see the effort and the progress he’s making.

However, that’s not good enough for Jenny. How could she just forget the past? She knew what this guy was like! And no matter what change she may be seeing now, her already-formed opinion remains.

Jenny believes that a leopard never changes its spots. So she knows that whatever improvements she's seen in Matt are not real. Even when others who used to complain about Matt told her about the positive changes they’ve seen, she simply explained them away. After all, people don’t change!

This attitude irks Matt.

What more do I need to do? I listened to what they told me! I’ve tried to change because of all the feedback and coaching I’ve received. Still, it’s not enough! I’m tired!

As a result, they continue to butt heads. With the prolonged, ongoing confrontation with Jenny, Matt’s motivation took a nose dive. His performance started to falter. He simply hated the environment in which he now has to work. He now had to drag himself out of bed each morning.

As Jenny began to notice the change in Matt’s performance, it only reinforced the negative perception she already had about him.

Now he’s gone from being difficult to work with to downright incompetent!

What happened? This was someone who was very good at what he does. How did he suddenly become inept at doing the same job? His job responsibilities haven’t changed, so what changed? What happened to this once engaged, high performer?

Jenny started thinking of how to get rid of Matt. But before she could make a move, Matt resigned. He took another job where his zeal and enthusiasm returned. And he returned to being a good performer.

Team leaders and supervisors need very short memory when it comes to areas where their people need to improve. That’s especially true when you see them making the effort towards positive change. We need to nurture and encourage them. We should reward and recognize them for the change, even if it’s baby steps.

I understand that this is not natural for many of us. But as leaders, we need to work at it. We need a change from this natural tendency. If we don’t, and we allow past experiences to discolor present reality, we may end up losing valuable people.

If we don’t, our organizations and teams will be the worse for it.